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Wharton, Edith, 1862-1937

"The Greater Inclination"

"Oh, do you see the full derision of it? These people--the
very prototypes of the bores you took me away from, with the same fenced--
in view of life, the same keep-off-the-grass morality, the same little
cautious virtues and the same little frightened vices--well, I've clung to
them, I've delighted in them, I've done my best to please them. I've
toadied Lady Susan, I've gossiped with Miss Pinsent, I've pretended to be
shocked with Mrs. Ainger. Respectability! It was the one thing in life
that I was sure I didn't care about, and it's grown so precious to me that
I've stolen it because I couldn't get it in any other way."
She moved across the room and returned to his side with another laugh.
"I who used to fancy myself unconventional! I must have been born with a
card-case in my hand. You should have seen me with that poor woman in the
garden. She came to me for help, poor creature, because she fancied that,
having 'sinned,' as they call it, I might feel some pity for others who
had been tempted in the same way. Not I! She didn't know me. Lady Susan
would have been kinder, because Lady Susan wouldn't have been afraid. I
hated the woman--my one thought was not to be seen with her--I could have
killed her for guessing my secret. The one thing that mattered to me at
that moment was my standing with Lady Susan!"
Gannett did not speak.
"And you--you've felt it too!" she broke out accusingly. "You've enjoyed
being with these people as much as I have; you've let the chaplain talk to
you by the hour about 'The Reign of Law' and Professor Drummond.


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