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Colette, 1873-1954

"Barks and Purrs"

I see his whiskers ... they're like white
needles. Whew! What eyes! (_He jumps back_.) I'm rather afraid. One
can't really shut a cat up; he always manages to get out somehow. ... He
must suffer, poor fellow! Perhaps if I speak kindly to him ... (_he
calls very politely_) Cat!
KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_spitting furiously_)
Khhh!...
TOBY-DOG, (_jumping back_)
Oh, you said a bad word! You look awful! Have you a pain anywhere?
KIKI-THE-DEMURE
Go away! I'm a martyr.... Go away I tell you, or I'll blow fire at you!
TOBY-DOG, (_ingenuous_)
But why?
KIKI-THE-DEMURE
Why!--Because you're free, because I'm in this basket, because the
basket's in a foul carriage which is shaking me to pieces, and because
the serenity of those two exasperates me.
TOBY-DOG
Would you like me to look out and tell you what one sees from the
carriage window?
KIKI-THE-DEMURE
Everything is equally odious to me.
TOBY-DOG, (_having looked out, comes back_)
I haven't seen anything....
KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_bitterly_)
Thanks just the same.
TOBY-DOG
I mean I haven't seen anything that's easy to describe.


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