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Various

"The Wit and Humor of America, Volume VI. (of X.)"

That's General Jackson. My father shook
hands with him once. He was a fighter, I know. He fit down in New
Orleans. Broke up the rebel legislature, and then when the Ku-Kluxes got
after him he fought 'em behind cotton breastworks and licked 'em till
they couldn't stand. They say he was terrific when he got real mad,--hit
straight from the shoulder, and fetched his man every time. Andrew his
fust name was; and look how his hair stands up.
"And then here's John Adams, and Daniel Boone, and two or three pirates,
and a whole lot more pictures; so you see it's cheap as dirt. Lemme have
your name, won't you?"


HER VALENTINE
BY RICHARD HOVEY

What, send her a valentine? Never!
I see you don't know who "she" is.
I should ruin my chances forever;
My hopes would collapse with a fizz.
I can't see why she scents such disaster
When I take heart to venture a word;
I've no dream of becoming her master,
I've no notion of being her lord.
All I want is to just be her lover!
She's the most up-to-date of her sex,
And there's such a multitude of her,
No wonder they call her complex.


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