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Phillips, H. W.

"Fables For The Times"

"But let us be thankful that the
pink-and-green elephant and the feathered hippopotamus are not also in
evidence."
And he took a dose of bromide and commended himself again to sleep, while
the serpent withdrew in some confusion.

WHAT THIS PROVES TO A THINKING MIND:
Jove himself couldn't get a job as Sunday-School Superintendent on his
reputation.
[Illustration: The Man and the Serpent.]


The Appreciative Man.

A man stood in the archway of an ancient temple. He took in the wonderful
proportions and drank of the exquisite detail in an ecstasy of delight.
"Oh, great is art!" he cried in a frenzy. "Art is all! the only God!"
Just then an earthquake came mumbling along and jarred the whole country
loose.
As the man picked himself out of the jumbled-up ruins into the dust-filled
air, he encountered a lion who had lost his tail and his temper in the
_melee_.
"Well, where's your art now?" snarled the lion.[1]
"All in my eye, I reckon," answered the man, as he bathed his damaged
optic.
[Illustration: The Appreciative Man.]


On the Not-Altogether-Credible Habits of the Ostrich.

An ostrich, who was closely pursued by a hunter, suddenly thrust his head
deep down into the sand.
"Ah! ah!" exulted the hunter, "I have the silly thing at last." He advanced
to place a rope around the bird's legs; but the ostrich, who had accurately
timed his arrival, landed a kick in the pit of his stomach that sent him
into the hereafter like a bullet through a fog-bank.


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