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Rostand, Edmond, 1868-1918

"Chantecler Play in Four Acts"


FIRST CHICKEN
But do you scan [_Beating furiously with his wing._] one-one-two
One-three? Three-one? Or four? What is your dynamic theory?
THE BLACKBIRD
[_Shouting._] Who has not his little pet dynamic theory?
CHANTECLER
Dyna--?
SECOND CHICKEN
Where do you place the accent? On the Cock--?
THIRD CHICKEN
On the Doo?
CHANTECLER
On the--
FIRST CHICKEN
[_Impatiently._] What is your school?
CHANTECLER
Schools of Cocks?
SECOND CHICKEN
[_Rapidly._] Certainly. Some sing Cock-a-doodle-doo, and some
Keek-a-deedle-dee!
CHANTECLER
Cock--? Keek--?
THIRD CHICKEN
Not to speak of those who--
A COCK
[_Coming forward._] The correct and proper way to crow is
Cowkerdowdledow!
CHANTECLER
What Cock is that?
FIRST CHICKEN
An Anglo-Indian.
SECOND CHICKEN
And the Turk over there, whose comb suggests a cyst, crows
Coocooroocoocoo!
THIRD CHICKEN
[_Shouting in his ear._] Do you not upon occasions vary your
Cockadoodledoo with Cackadaddledaa?
ANOTHER COCK
[_Springing up at the right._] I, for one, entirely suppress the vowels:
C-ck-d-dl-d!
CHANTECLER
[_Trying to get away._] Is it a Welsh Rabbit dream?
ANOTHER COCK
[_Springing up at the left._] O-a-oo-e-oo! Have you ever tried
suppressing the consonants?
ANOTHER COCK
[_Pushing aside all the others._] I mix the whole thing
up--Cuck-o-deedle-daa!--in a free and supple song!
CHANTECLER
My brain reels!
ALL THE COCKS
[_Gathered about him, fighting.


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