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O'Neill, Eugene, 1888-1953

"The Hairy Ape"


[Sharply.] What's your notion of the purpose of the I. W. W.?
YANK--Aw, I know all about it.
SECRETARY--[Sarcastically.] Well, give us some of your valuable
information.
YANK--[Cunningly.] I know enough not to speak outa my toin. [Then
resentfully again.] Aw, say! I'm reg'lar. I'm wise to de game. I
know yuh got to watch your step wit a stranger. For all youse
know, I might be a plain-clothes dick, or somep'n, dat's what
yuh're tinkin', huh? Aw, forget it! I belong, see? Ask any guy
down to de docks if I don't.
SECRETARY--Who said you didn't?
YANK--After I'm 'nitiated, I'll show yuh.
SECRETARY--[Astounded.] Initiated? There's no initiation.
YANK--[Disappointed.] Ain't there no password--no grip nor
nothin'?
SECRETARY--What'd you think this is--the Elks--or the Black Hand?
YANK--De Elks, hell! De Black Hand, dey're a lot of yellow
backstickin' Ginees. Naw. Dis is a man's gang, ain't it?
SECRETARY--You said it! That's why we stand on our two feet in the
open. We got no secrets.
YANK--[Surprised but admiringly.] Yuh mean to say yuh always run
wide open--like dis?
SECRETARY--Exactly.
YANK--Den yuh sure got your noive wit youse!
SECRETARY--[Sharply.] Just what was it made you want to join us?
Come out with that straight.
YANK--Yuh call me? Well, I got noive, too! Here's my hand.


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