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Disraeli, Benjamin, Earl of Beaconsfield, 1804-1881

"Venetia"

He found them,
Venetia, he found them in her whom he had known longest and most
intimately, and loved from his boyhood. Talk of constancy, indeed! who
has been so constant as my cousin? No, Venetia! you may think fit to
bow to the feelings of your mother, and it would be impertinence in me
to doubt for an instant the propriety of your conduct: I do not doubt
it; I admire it; I admire you, and everything you have done; none can
view your behaviour throughout all these painful transactions with
more admiration, I might even say with more reverence, than myself;
but, Venetia, you never can persuade me, you have never attempted to
persuade me, that you yourself are incredulous of the strength and
permanency of my cousin's love.'
'Ah, George! you are our friend!' said Venetia, a tear stealing down
her cheek. 'But, indeed, we must not talk of these things. As for
myself, I think not of happiness. I am certain I am not born to be
happy. I wish only to live calmly; contentedly, I would say; but that,
perhaps, is too much. My feelings have been so harrowed, my mind so
harassed, during these last few years, and so many causes of pain and
misery seem ever hovering round my existence, that I do assure you,
my dear friend, I have grown old before my time.


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