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Grand, Sarah

"Ideala"

At first, you know, I thought of nothing. I was
wholly absorbed in my desire to see him; that excluded every other
consideration. Do you know what it is to be sure that a thing is wrong,
and yet not to be able to feel it so--to have your reason acknowledge
what your conscience does not confirm?"
I made no answer, and we were silent for a little; then she spoke
again:
"One day when I was in Japan," she said, "I was living up in the hills
at Hakone, a village on a lake three thousand feet above the level of
the sea. The Mayor of the village was entertaining me, and whenever I
went out he sent his son and several of his retainers as an escort,
that I might not be subject to annoyance or insult from strangers. One
day I was crossing the hills by a mountain-path there is between Hakone
and Mianoshita, and after I passed Ashynoyou, where the sulphur springs
are, I found myself in a dense fog. I could not see anything distinctly
three yards in front of me. Kashywaya and the other men never walked
with me; they used to hover about me, leaving me to all intents and
purposes alone if I preferred it.


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