When you start out to the point of forgetfulness, you
must keep it up; regret comes back threefold with soberness. It seems
silly and weak for a man who has been buffeted as I have, who is
supposed to gather wisdom and philosophy as a snowball gathers snow as
it rolls down hill, to try to drown regret and disappointment in
liquor. A man never knows how weak he is till he meets the one woman
and she will have none of him."
And somehow I got closer to Hillars, spiritually. There were two of
us, so it seemed, only I was stronger, or else my passion did not burn
so furiously as his.
The apartments occupied by Dan were all a bachelor could wish for. The
walls were covered with photographs, original drawings, beer steins,
pipes, a slipper here, a fan there, and books and books and books. I
felt at home at once.
I watched Hillars as he moved about the room, tidying up things a bit,
and I noticed now more than ever how changed he was. His face had
grown thin, his hair was slightly worn at the crown and temples, and
there were dark circles under his eyes. Yet, for all these signs of
dissipation, he was still a remarkably handsome man.
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