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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, September 5, 1891"


_Miss T._ Well, I don't know as a thorn in the flesh is any the
pleasanter for having a good point.
_Culch._ Profoundly true, indeed. I often think I could like him
better if there were less in him to like. I assure you he tries me so
at times that I could almost wish I was back at work in my department
at Somerset House!
_Miss T._ I daresay you have pretty good times there, too. Isn't that
one of your leading dry goods stores?
_Culch._ (_pained_). It is not; it is a Government Office, and I am
in the Pigeonhole and Docket Department, with important duties to
discharge. I hope you didn't imagine I sold ribbons and calico over a
counter?
_Miss T._ (_ambiguously_). Well, I wasn't just sure. It takes a pretty
bright man to do that where I come from.
_An Old Lady_ (_who is sitting next to PODBURY, and reading a
home-letter to another Old Lady_). "Dear MARIA and dear MADELINE
are close by, they have taken very comfortable lodgings in Marine
Crescent. Dear MADELINE's frame is expected down next Saturday."
_Second Old Lady_. MADELINE's frame! Is anything wrong with the poor
girl's spine?
_First Old Lady_. I never heard of it. Oh, I see, it's _fiance_,
my dear. CAROLINE _does_ write so illegibly. (_Continuing._)
"Um--um,--suppose you know she will be maimed--" (perhaps it _is_
her spine after all--oh, _married_, to be sure), "very slowly" (is it
slowly or shortly, I wonder?), um--um, "very quiet wedding, nobody but
dear Mr. WILKINSON and his hatter.


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